Dear College Football Playoff committee: turn your Uber drivers around.
Why even bother heading to North Texas for Tuesday’s “exciting” first announcement of the first playoff standings?
Ok, we get it, Monsieur Rankman did the “mock” selection a couple years ago. The turn-down service and finger foods were fabulous.
Maybe Condi Rice wants to sing show tunes at the hotel piano bar.
Thanks to all Saturday's significant drama, however, there is zilch left for the committee.
ESPN may need to bring in mimes, or circus animals, to keep me entertained for a show I don’t need to watch.
Spare us, please, any suspense builds or drum rolls.
The first four schools in the first ranking will be, in order: Alabama, Michigan, Clemson and Washington.
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Saturday, now that was something to talk about, as four of the nation’s nine undefeated teams went down in clichés (flames, blaze of glory…).
Yet, that only crystallized the cathedral.
Clemson’s comeback win at Florida State in Tallahassee put it all in a neatly, folded napkin.
The top four schools in the AP and USA Today coaches’ polls, will also be the committee’s top four. Fifth-ranked Louisville made it easier by needing a touchdown in the last-seconds to beat…Virginia?
The safest place to be undefeated this weekend, for sure, was at home snuggling under a bye blanket.
Sipping hot chocolate, maybe, or going over early Christmas card lists.
Alabama and Western Michigan, two of the untainted nine teams left entering the weekend, could sit back, relax, and watch it all play out.
The seven undefeated teams that did play either lost, or were severely close-shaved.
All the games were competitive except for, maybe, Oklahoma State’s 17-point win over West Virginia. That would have been close had three WVU turnovers not led directly to 17 points.
No. 2 Michigan beat Michigan State…by nine.
No. 3 Clemson beat Florida State…by three. The Seminoles had a chance to win in the end but suddenly became False Start University.
No. 4 Washington defeated Utah…by seven. This was a great game in Salt Lake City and the first real test for Washington, which probably isn’t going to get away with losing AND playing Rutgers, Portland and Idaho in nonconference.
Washington committed some stupid penalties, but prevailed against a tough team, when the going got tough, on Dante Pettis’ 58-yard punt return for touchdown.
Chris Petersen has his Huskies so focused they’re not even sure what day comes after this Monday.
“If they’re looking at that,” he said of Tuesday’s first CFP release, “They’re looking at the wrong stuff.”
The margins for the other previously undefeated schools were thin:
Texas over Baylor by one, Wyoming over Boise State by two and Wisconsin over Nebraska by six, in overtime.
Any home win at Wyoming is a high because the elevation in Laramie is 7,220 feet. Yet, Saturday’s was special because it was the Cowboys’ first over Boise after starting the series 0-10.
Wyoming clinched the win, late, on a safety.
The Cowboys have now won four straight games in the Mountain West for the first time since…ever. The win over Boise was the school’s first over a ranked team since 2002.
Third-year coach Craig Bohl was so jacked afterward he even cut short a post-game cliché to the CBS-affiliated cable channel airing the broadcast.
“This puts us back on…” said Bohls, who started to say “right track” but opted for “I don’t know, I’m just going to go enjoy it!!”
And lest we forget, before closing shop, to thank Texas!
The previously discombobulated Foghorn Longhorns, of all teams, stunned Baylor in Austin.
There is usually “no cheering allowed in the press box,” but an exception can be made in the case of the scandal-stained Baylor program.
No disrespect to current Baylor players caught up in the maelstrom, but this “feel-bad” story needs to go on hiatus for a year or two, or three. Not only had the Bears played another ridiculous non-conference schedule, unworthy of playoff consideration, the school’s ongoing sexual assault saga has been a blight on Baylor, the Big 12, sport, and society.
It was also nice to see Texas coach Charlie Strong get a reprieve from his imminent firing, if you read the internet.
“It’s not a program in disarray, which many of you think,” Strong said in his post-game press conference after Texas improved to 4-4. “It’s not a program that’s going backward.”
Strong said he was embarrassed his players had to listen to the ugly stuff being said about their coach.
“I’m not reading it,” he said of the stories, “but they’re reading it.”
Strong should receive a vote of confidence, if only from the playoff committee, just for knocking Baylor out of the “what-do-we-do-with-them?” conversation.
And for those of us still ticked the Big 12 dragged us through months of expansion wedding plans, only to call the ceremony off at the altar, good playoff riddance.
The league now has no unbeaten teams left and is the only power conference that won’t host a league title game this year.
Adios, right? Unless two-loss Oklahoma can make like LSU in 2007?
Anyway, so much for this Tuesday being suspenseful.
Apparently, though, there’s something important happening a week from Tuesday.[/membership]